One of the things I vowed that I would work on during this round of NaBloPoMo is my habit of discounting anything other than a formal blog post as ‘not a real post’. I have a tendency toward perfectionism, which inevitably leads to me giving up when I realize that I can’t possibly live up to the standard that I’ve set for myself. It’s silly, really – I spend half of my workday explaining to high school kids the value of hands-on experience and experimentation and creativity, and then I stifle those things in myself.
I suppose it stems from my self-esteem issues in high school. I was constantly petrified of looking stupid, and so I carefully guarded anything other than what I saw as my best work. But as I age and come to know myself better, I’m learning that limiting the parts of me that others see benefits no one. In fact, I’m finding that my imperfections and my efforts to work on them have brought me new friends that challenge me, new interests that excite me, and new knowledge that makes me a more interesting and well-rounded person.
Sooooo thank you for listening and allowing me to work my shit out in here.