KELLY: “In honour of Flashback Friday, I’m sitting down with my dear sweet mother to hear the story of my first words.”

(Giggling and rustling sounds as we scuffle for position on the couch)

KELLY: “Ok, so how old was I when I said my first words?”

SUZY: (making a weird face because she’s uncomfortable with the speech recorder) “How old? Well, your first words were surprising. You were 18 months old. A lot of noise had come out of you already (sound of me snorting), but one night we were sitting on the couch and… I can still remember exactly where you were sitting, on my right hand side…. we were reading Snow White for the umpteenth time. I was sleepy, being a tired mom — one eye open one eye closed — and we were reading the story AGAIN, and I at one point said “And Snow White’s hair was as black as-” and then I yawned, and you said ‘Ebony!’ (Picture Suzy’s eyes as wide as dinner plates here) I was in shock! I looked at you–” (more scuffling as I try to get mom to move her foot)

KELLY: “Continue the story, please.” (I did not actually say please)

SUZY: “I said ‘Oh my God!” and I thought, I’m gonna try this again, and I said ‘And her skin was as white as …. YAAAAAWWWNNNNNNNN’ and you said ‘Snow!’ and I looked at you again and thought oh my goodness, she has the story memorized! I guess I better get a new book because this one, this one is getting old.”

KELLY: “So are you sure that those are my first words? I didn’t say anything else before?”

SUZY: “I can’t remember you saying anything other than maybe mom or dad. I remember… I just remember being in total shock.”

KELLY: “So basically, they may not have been my first words literally, but they make a much better story.”

I love this story. It highlights not only my unparalleled ability to memorize useless trivia, but also my passion for putting words in other people’s mouths. Also, multi syllabic first words! 🤓👍

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